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My name is Lauren.
this is where i put my life stories into the web for you guys to read. =)
I'm 19 years of age. and i'm born in Janurary
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Chapters.Pages.Paragraphs.
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Monday, December 21, 2009
Once again the time is here.
Festive,Full of Presents But without any snow to enjoy.
Yes it is ! Christmas!!
FOUR MORE DAYS TO CHIRSTMAS!!!
Who can be as excited as me?
Only Gawd knows how much i'm lovin presents and not to mentioned a day dedicated to the Season of giving.
This year i'll have programmes all lined up for me to go to :
1) Sandra's Birthday-Christmas Chalet @ Downtown East.
2)My very own Cousin's Christmas Chalet at Changi
3)Christmas Celebration with Affable
Just these three are good enough for me.
Not to mentioned someone's getting older yet another year now..
Though this year has been filled up with really stormy days and times when i was drowned by many factors. Those lighthouses are always taking turns to be there for me no matter what. (Thank You Guys =) )
Though some of the lighthouse have seemed to be loosing their light to help me when i'm in need of them the most but i know that they still care.
I just can't bring myself to be mad with anyone now that the most anticipating day of every year is reaching me soon. =)
Did i mentioned how much i love Christmas? Yes yes yes i do love Christmas, Don't know why but i love it though till the day i'll be spending it alone this year.Labels: four more dayss..
5:35 PM
Friday, December 18, 2009
Last Evening.
This evening one of which made another history of my life.
Abandoning someone that i can call a friend for another person whom i've fallen for.
Unforgiveable! But i still did it.
Call me Selfish, Self-less,Brainless. That's me.
With no other reasons and hesitations i left my one and so far only friend in this circle and went to meet you. Dinner,Chilling,Talking,Ice-cream,Home.
Talking about this friend of mine whom you've find him attractive to you makes me feel so so rejected silently. You said i'm not a speck of your heart. Then what am i ? A friend whom reflects an old you in your past r/s. So??
" Maybe I shouldn't like you further"
My Grandma's maid left the country today Ria's her name.
She made me a card saying how much i should behave and a red packet for my upcoming Birthday.
I Miss Her. ='(
Labels: It's my last Night shift.
11:54 PM
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Two Hours from now the Shift Begins.
Shifts that Drains you more than any other, that shows the other side of patients to you, that you have to swallow whatever that has be "thrown" at your face.
Night Shifts. Something that sounds so unimaginative but i survived 1/3 of it!!
I thought about it when i woke up from my sleep this evening and thought of how we might turn out to be or what will be in the few weeks down the road. I just got frightened. Then i asked myself why do i feel this way knowing that we're just friends who've just got to know each other recently only. But i can't contain how much feelings i have for you. You said i reminded you of yourself, and vice versa. Why? Why must you want to take things slow for me?? I'm almost unable to wait...What am i to do? Lost, Helpless, Direction-less.
Labels: First Night of the Three
6:51 PM
Monday, December 14, 2009
Tomorrow's the Night Shift Part of PRCP.
Been in contact with someone whom i think i've once again falled for. But this person wants things to go through slow and steady. Well not that i don't like the idea of it, all out for it. But you know sometimes you are single for too long and you just feel like finding a partner and settle down within the quickest time possible.
With Christmas in 11 days more to arrive and Mum's Birthday in 9 Days to come. I'm screwed for not having a single idea to get presents for Both Mum and Sandra for their Birthdays.
Listening to just symphonic music just makes my wild thoughts run slower than it was this afternoon. What happened this afternoon was madness!! When it snowballs all the way to the evening i almost couldn't take it. Boredom took in and i almost went Bersak! like seriously. No shows for me to watch! Hungry! Had no mood to even head out! Missing some idoit so badly somemore!
Last Night as i would like to mentioned. Though it was Really out of the blue that you wanted to meet me. But i'm glad at the same time that we've finally met up. Having chats that i've not given to someone for a loong time. Talking about really anything under the moonlight. The walks were short but were nice at the same time. Labels: A cocktail of emotions.
11:34 PM
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
4:04 PM
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Today's a Sunday.
6th December 2009.
I went to attachment today.
Am feeling really really tired now.
But can't help to think of so much things around me.
Soon it'll be Hello Monday.
Labels: SunDay
4:21 PM
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
If there's a record of things that i've not done and i've done.
Today will be ink-ed up.
I went out with a group of gay friends of mine, the thing is they were just pure real friends of which i've actually trusted to go out with. Give me another group of this sort i'll definately reject.
And So you've just read how was my day.
Freakin scared, shocked, almost fainted on the spot.
But then it turned out fine. Nonetheless to say that they bitched BUT with a triggered fact. Other then that it just seemed pretty fun ( I'd say).
Getting a sound system with a cost of 2000 dollars was just something i'll not see myself doing in any future. (MAN!! TMTH)
But it didn't felt so awkward afterall. Heading to the movies afterwards. Watched,Survived (another horror movie) Case 39.
Then the whole time i realised that i was unconciously waiting, waiting and waiting for his message. Message of saying "hi i'm busy but am thinking of you." or "hey i'm doing project now. But have you had dinner? it's getting late" But nevertheless without any thinking he didn't texted or not to even mentioned called. What i got when i get home and showered? A miss call. Which i foolishly rushed for the house phone and called him back. Only to realised it's the same " I'll call you back" Wow. Thankz Man.Then you texted saying we are not for each other coz of my attitude.
Attitude of mine. Am i really so bad? isn't being concern what you need from me? a agree i was harsh. but i get back to you the instant you missed call me. How happy and angry i felt. I wanted to tell you off alittle and told you how much i missed you. Messeges of sorry and of my true colours and feeling are now to texted you. Result? i can't predict.
11:52 PM
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
It's the first of December.
As much as i can dwell on the past of the First of every month which was supposed to mean our anniversary (by right it's supposed to be our fourth) i will not dwell in the past.
Well today Finally went swimming with Sandra @ Pasir Ris. Went up to visit her Aunt and Grand-Aunt. (Really nice people !!) Played Monopoly and yup it was FUN! =)
It's the second day of my off. Though yesterday i was really moody coz i was stuck like a leech at home. But today paid all off.
10:38 PM
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